The ALLEY PAT Pages

hey there -- nothing highly original to tell ya or anything. just wanted to let you know that some friends of mine from Atlanta (i'm out here in California) turned me on to Alley Pat about 10 years ago and would often sneak choice little nuggets of Pat's on-air wisdom into mix-tapes they'd send out.

i spent a lot of time redistributing those little sound-bites -- hysterical stuff. (one ad for a place i believe is called "T-Burger" described a "steak so juicy you could cut it with a thought -- you don't need no fork and knife!".)

another classic: a little gem about a salvage yard -- i wish i could remember the name.... Pat described it as "specializing in everything! that's why we say: if we ain't got it today, come on back tomorrow; we'll have it." he also claimed that no matter what you brought in, they'd "give you somethin' on it. it might not be much, but it'll be something. it could be some dishes, it could be WHATEVER." the phrase "it could be some dishes" has become a catch phrase with everyone who knows me all across the country, i love it so much...

i s'pose only Alley Pat could have me rambling about him to some stranger -- but anyone putting up a webpage about him will clearly understand...

one more nugget -- the ad for the mortuary, where he encouraged folks to go down there because it was a "joyous place". "you should be happy when he passed on -- he went through hell when he was alive, and now he's through with all of that!" if only i could listen to Pat out here...-wil hendricks

Wil, I know the salvage yard spot. Hilarious! The Burger joint is a new one on me. Sounds like a Pat line, though. One of the tapes Tom sent me has a great spot for a niteclub next to a cemetary, where Pat says if you get too drunk, they can take you out and lay you on a slab.

I was just telling someone about Alley Pat's definition of a professional "...that's someone who can do their job drunk, and the folks at Capitol Cadillac can fix your car drunk!" Then I thought there must being something on the 'net about Pat and sure enought I found your tribute. I use to listen to Pat on WYZE, where he would tell his audience they had "no business listening to this radio station before 3 o'clock, because all you will hear are those lying preachers!" Then he would introduce his pastor, the right reverend, Ray Charles.

I worked at WGST in Atlanta during the late '70's and early '80's. Pat came up there for an interview on some community thing. Upon meeting an obviously pregnant staff member, he said "And I bet you thought the gun wasn't loaded!"

2 more things. One time Pat was talking to an old woman on the air and she was saying she wasn't afraid to go out at night. Pat told her it was dangerous for her to go out in her neighborhood at night without a gun. She told him she didn't need a gun to protect her. She told Pat that "Jesus was her gun". Pat said "Jesus ain't no fool, he ain't goin out on them streets at after dark!"

I live in Washington DC and we have a few characters on the Pacifica station here that play the blues, but they are far too polite.

Thanks for the memory, -David Oziel

I remember sitting in traffic jams repeatedly nearly crying with laughter some days. "So git yeseslf a room at the Palamont Motor Lodge where the rooms are smartly furnished and some have color TV's. It's at the corner of Piedmont and Auburn where EVERYTHING happens! -Tom Roche, Atlanta

I just read your piece on the net that mentioned Alley Pat Patrick. I moved to Atlanta in late 1978 and left in mid 1980 and listened to Alley Pat on WYZE. He was hilarious.

One time I saw him on a local UHF TV show and he looked much younger than I imagined him to look. I'll never forget his ads for "Roach-Pruf", or the Crescendo Lounge, or all the other nonsense, like "LONDON TAXI! The cab company that is SO CLEAN, they make the drivers take a shower before every shift!". I think it was in 1981 I was at work in Seattle and missing his show, and realized it was 2pm in Seattle and Alley Pat was probably holding forth at that moment. I really missed him, and called WYZE, knowing full well that he had the habit of putting callers right on the air without any warning and giving them a hard time.

He answered, and was very polite, so I decided he must not have me on the air. I told him how much I missed his show, and he was very nice, and suggested that we really needed him in Seattle, and that he should be syndicated. He thought that was a wonderful idea, but I wasn't sure if he was just kidding me. As we were about to hang up, he said "Tell me sumthin! Are you calling me on your boss' phone line?" Well, yes, I stammered, I was. "Good!" he bellowed. "I knew you wuz crazy for listenin to mah show, but I figgered you weren't STUPID!". He cackled, and as I hung up the phone, I heard him say to the radio audience; "There's that crazy white boy from Seattle!" -Tad Cook

I've visited your site often (specially when I need a good laugh). My Alley Pat "rememberen" was one of the times I was up late and saw his show on channel 69 about 12 years ago. He had as his guest that time, and I'll never forget how he introduced him, "Here he is y'all, back by popular demand. The BIGGEST FOOL to ever sit on the Atlanta City Council, We ain't talkin bout nobody but Hosea Williams". Right on cue Hosea came back with "And the police pulled me over for speedin', and then said 'you must be on yo way to Alley Pat's Place'. I said that's just where I'm going, and they let me go".

As the show went on Hosea talked about Black elected officials and other unmentionables who shouldn't be in office. Pat had a reply that stood out. "You know it ain't gonna do a bit of good saying folks should get more involved, cause the minute they see a bunch of us in the halls, they just say 'some of y'all got to go to work'. And that's when they vote on stuff" (or something to that effect).

But another CLASSIC PAT came when Hosea mentioned his son Hosea (who preceeded him in death), was hospitalized in North Carolina. Hosea told Pat, "Let me tell something bout Hosea, Hosea is a health nut. He made more money last year, than I ever made in a lifetime. He don't drank....Pat jump in "HE DON'T DRANK? HE KIN TO YOU AND DON'T DRANK?" Then they each challenged each other, Hosea would run for mayor and Pat for City Council.

Just thought I'd share my rememberin for Dat Crazy Pat -Chester Alexander

I'm a big lifetime fan of Alley Pat. Two memories. Once Pat was talking after the holidays. He was talking to the women in his audience along the lines of you gotten fat because of all that eating over Christmas and then regarding their man he said, "No telling how much that hog weighs." When I attended GA State in the 60's I locked myself out of my car and needed to break into it. Pat's Bonding Office was right next to the parking lot and he very graciously lent me a tool to break into my car. In that brief meeting with him, he was very nice and soft-spoken on a personal level. Thanks for your site. - Jim Thompson

I've attached a .jpg of my dad. It's the same one WAOK now uses on their web site. It's from the earlier days of WAOK when he was on the air with a show he called "Diggin' the Disc with Daddy Sears." He originated the show on WGST, carried it over to WATL which became WAOK. This was sort of his "poster pose" that was used as a photo or cartoon on most of his promotional material. -Chuck Sears

Thanks, Chuck, and sorry its taken me so long to finally correct the picture. Your dad ZENAS SEARS was truly one of the great men of radio in my opinion.

Add me to your e-mail list. I remember the Alley Pat Show coming on late nights and the best shows (Entertaining and Educational) were with Alley Pat & Hosea Williams. I would love to learn more. - Tammi Robinson

IF YOU'VE GOT A STORY, PICTURES OR AUDIO TO SHARE WITH OTHER ALLEY PAT FANS, PLEASE DROP ME A LINE. AND THANKS TO ALL OF YOU FOR COMING BY.